Though I didn’t know it as a kid I was on a path, a path to help others overcome the challenges that they face in their life. Growing up I had some things going for me, but I also came up against a lot of challenges. More importantly, I faced challenges on many fronts that I believed to be insurmountable. In school I struggled, I was crushed to discover that I didn’t seem to fit in, making friends was a task I didn’t know how to take on. Classes were no different; writing, math, forget it! I didn’t want to sit still, never mind do what teachers told me to do, and learn what others dictated I should learn. When I was 12 I began losing my vision to a rare, then untreatable eye condition, and at 13 I was severely injured throughout my body at an intensive soccer camp. There I was, trapped, in so many ways. Trapped in a body that felt broken and full of pain, trapped in my head because my eyes were slowly degenerating, trapped in a system that didn’t work for me, and ultimately feeling lost without the ability to create the intimate human connection I craved. I didn’t see a future for myself, my prospects for life seemed grim.
A light appeared for me in the form of a college gap year program. The first major life decision of my life that I got to make. Shortly before it began I discovered a doctor that was able to make a special contact lens to correct my poor vision, and subsequently it seemed that the whole world began to open up before me. As the year began, a whole new world opened up and I was introduced to concepts of emotional literacy, responsibility, integrity. I learned about how to handle money, traveled the world, learned a new language, and was coached into cultivating a vision for my life. As I was exposed to new ideas and a whole new world (the third world) it began to change me. I began cultivating close intimate friendships with my peers. For the first time in my life I felt seen, and in being seen I transformed.
The people in my life at that time have told me that they have never seen a person change so much, not to mention that it occurred over a short span of a year. I went from painfully awkward to befriending almost everyone I came across, I went from living in a state of fear and despair to living in joy, unable to get a smile off of my face. I went from being stiff and unaware of my body, to graceful and present in my own skin. I went from scattered to focused both in small moments and in the larger focus of my life. From repressed to fully expressed in my life both personally and professionally.
Today I help others become fully expressed in their own lives. Where do you have room to become more fully expressed? What is your vision for your life!?
After that experience I felt so empowered that over the span of a few weeks I researched and with some help I designed for myself my own world class education, I outlined the things I would learn, the places I would go, the papers I would write and the people I would learn from. And then I went forward and did it!
Things got really good for me, I started my own business and things went well. Over time though I began to compromise my values though, life seemed to shrink in around me again. I felt I was limited to a small impact and a predictable future, and not one I felt excited about. I happened to have a friend who was a life coach. I didn’t know what it was at the time but she did a session with me that completely changed my day to day life to this day. Just over a year later I awoke in the middle of the night with the very certain knowledge that I needed to do that training. So I went and trained with Coby Kozlowski. It turned out to be the second biggest transformation in my life. I learned that living an extraordinary life means asking yourself hard questions…alot. Like:
Are you willing to do the work? well…Are you? And then actually doing the work if the answer is yes…but only barely, and with lots of resistance, fear and vulnerability. Are you ready to embark on a journey? One that will lead you into the unknown, into something bigger than you thought you were capable of?
One of the biggest revelations was that I learned that I could change my beliefs and perspectives about the world, then I learned how, and started doing it. I’m not talking about believing the earth is round, I’m talking about the kinds of beliefs that got in my way every day. The kinds of beliefs that I thought just came with my life, inherited, true and unmovable. Beliefs that I wasn’t talented enough, smart enough, tall enough, experienced enough to start doing the things I wanted to do. That I would never make enough money, find the right partner, create a job that fulfilled me completely or gave me the freedom I wanted to life the life I wanted to live.
What are the beliefs that get in your way? Have you started to spot them yet? Have you learned to hear the gremlins whispering in your ear?
I committed myself to doing the work and hired a coach. I came face to face with my edges from the first session. I started taking on my beliefs around money, self worth, capability, surrender, power, control and love. As I tackled my limiting beliefs, I slowly began to believe that the things I really wanted to be doing were within my grasp.I wanted to be working with people one-on-one and in groups to help them grow and transform their lives, just as my life had been grown and transformed by the LEAPYEAR program I had done at the beginning of my education as an adult. I began to work as a life coach to facilitate the transformation of lives one-on-one, and with amazing business partners like Megan Morrison to put on group coaching workshops.
Since I started that journey I have continued onward doing addition trainings in coaching and facilitation to feed my hunger for learning and transformation. I discovered the power of working with groups through a practice called Circling. It was here that life made a full circle. Through this practice I deeply learned the inner workings of how to truly see and hear others and through this I was given the power to give back to the world what Leapnow had given me. Through the practice of Circling and other Authentic relating practices I built a community here in Somerville, MA. Where I lead regular community events, trainings, and retreats.
Today in addition to doing trainings for Coaches, Therapists, Facilitators and Leaders, I run a coaching practice serving those who wish to cultivate a deeper relationship with themselves, others and the world around them.